CELEBRITY LIVE SHOCKER - Chantelle spotted in ASK Billericay
So I’m sat waiting for my chocolate cake to arrive at ASK (an Italian Restaurant chain) in Shitsville (Billericay). My parents and I decided to get a late Sunday lunch there.
There was somewhat of a commotion to my left and I wondered if, perhaps, the waitress had accidentally dropped my chocolate cake, so I looked round.
There I saw two ladies, one blonde, one dark haired. Both were trying to figure the way out of the restaurant having been challenged in locating the door which, incidentally, was right in front of them. I had to stare at them to wonder at the level of intellect required to be unable to locate the restaurant’s door — on the basis of it a) being right ahead and b) the persons having come IN the door a few hours earlier. They weren’t drunk.
Cue a glimmer of recognition. I noticed one of the ladies – the blonde – was Famous-for-being-non-famous Chantelle (related BBC article), recent ‘nobody’ winner of Celebrity Big Brother here in the UK. The joke being that the producers managed to put a nobody in with 10 almost-ran Z list celebrities last year — and managed to convince the Z listers that Chantelle was indeed ‘famous’. The public loved it. I marvelled at the ingenuity and irony. The air of recognition was helped by heads popping up all over the restaurant and whispers of ‘that’s Chantelle’. For the aid of the international audience, I have posted a picture to the top left (BBC/PA).
Chantelle has made a name for herself after her Celebrity Big Brother success — and good luck to her.
Anyway the reason for this post is to admit that I failed both the mobile technology industry and humanity this afternoon. Sat there while Chantelle posed, smiled and signed autographs for the adoring Essix (sic) public in the restaurant, my N90 was within reach. It was sat right there. I could have turned round and yelled like the rest of them.
"CHANTELLLLLLLEEEEE THIS WAY"
"CHANTELLLLLEEEE"
I could have got my £75 or whatever it is for taking a picture of a ‘celebrity’ and getting it into Heat magazine. I could have quickly logged on to SpyMedia to see if there were any ‘Pictures of Chantelle in Billericay Restaurant’ picture requests (seriously doubt it). I could have blogged it live with ShoZu to millions.
But, er, I decided not to.
Why? Well, I don’t think I could be bothered. If it was Michael Douglas, George Clooney or Sophie Anderton? Hmm. Nah. I think perhaps it’s a little too crass to push your chocolate cake away to the centre of the table, flip out your N90, turn round and start gawping like the rest of them.
