First AT&T phone with Google Android will feature Yahoo search to annoy the hell out of every user

You have to smile when grown up executives who should know better sit back and make stupid decisions. The AppleInsider is reporting that….

Although Google makes the Android mobile operating system, the search giant’s chief competitor, Yahoo, will be the default provider on AT&T’s first Android-powered handset, due to be released March 7.

Great.

Talk about fragmentation on the Android platform.

Yes, you bought a ‘Google Phone’. But, no, the reason your search isn’t that good is because Yahoo is powering it. Sorry, I mean Bing. Yahoo doesn’t actually do search any more. While Bing does have some very good qualities — it’s search results aren’t quite there yet.

But what the hell are AT&T’s executives thinking?

Apparently there is a ‘long-standing relationship’ between AT&T and Yahoo for search partnerships. And this means that they’ve decided to screw about with the inner-workings of the device and really piss off consumers at the same time.

This is precisely why mobile operators need to be shot. In a nice way, you understand.

Some executive from AT&T and some executive from Yahoo have got together. They’ve both gone for very expensive martinis (on expenses) and discussed each others’ aims and objectives. They’ve nodded along with each other, they’ve got to know each other, they’ve — dare I say it — bonded with each other. After a few more martinis, the Yahoo guy confesses that they’re completely irrelevant ‘in mobil’ (it’s important to do the accent).

Nodding along, the AT&T guy, chest swelling, explains, “Well, you know Pierce, I can help…Yes, another round of martinis please…”

Pierce — the Yahoo Guy — sits back, with a slight frown, “How, Giles?”

“Well Pierce, we have eighty-five million subscribers…”

Giles takes a moment. He just loves flopping his subscriber number out on the table for the lads to look at.

Giles continues, “We have eighty-FIVE million subscribers, I’m sure we could put a bit of traffic your way…”

You just know it. Something like that happened, at some point, between Yahoo and AT&T.

They hatched a plan.

They thought it would be ‘super-fantastic’ to change the default search.

It’ll get folk chattering. It’ll show we’re with-it. It’ll let AT&T pretend to have a bit of relevance for 20 seconds during the initial announcement. It’ll breathe useless life into the decomposing carcass that is Yahoo’s ‘mobil’ strategy.

Not once has anyone thought about delivering the best possible user experience. No — that was traded away as soon as possible. That’s the thing with mobile operators. If there’s an opportunity to screw things up, to do the wrong thing (or the slightly wrong, annoying thing), they will. Especially if there’s a shite small amount of potential revenue in it.

Witness, for example, the carrier-deck b0llocks strategies that permeated the globe for much of the last half-decade.

Ridiculous.

Absolutely 100% ridiculous.

Would AT&T please get back into’s it box and fix their shitter-than-shit data network?

Would Yahoo please just get bought by somebody and put out of it’s misery?

I thank you.