Motorola: Nothing to see here, move along, move along

I headed by the Motorola stand to see what they’d got to show off.

Just a preface: We’re at America’s largest, most influential trade show. Motorola’s spend hundreds of thousands to deliver a big stand, they’ve flown in all their top people and … this is the bollocks they’ve got to show off:

I kid ye not.

A bollocks flip phone. With a bollocks camera. And — contain your excitement — I’m pretty sure this one comes with an Alarm Clock function.

Goodness me.

I couldn’t bear to look at the other devices on show. I simply couldn’t suppress my utter, utter disappointment. I didn’t want to start vomiting over the nice helpful Motorola team.

When I arrived on stand, there was a 40-year old chap going nuts with excitement over the next generation RAZR-bollocks handset. (Yes there was a RAZR in his holster on his belt).

“OH WOW! This is the new RAZR?” he said, picking it up as the Motorola stand person beamed with delight.

“Yeah!” she said, watching the chap obsess over it, before listing the rubbish specifications to the pure joy of the chap.

I felt like ripping it out of his hands and jamming it up his arse.

With his holster.

Is this the best Motorola have got to show for their few billion dollars worth of investment over the past months?

Come on.

I’m sure they’re working on some good stuff.

I hope they are.

Original post by Ewan and software by Elliott Back