What absolute MONKEY programmed T-Mobile UK's web portal?

You know I’ve been having so much trouble trying to PAY T-Mobile? The issue being that their STYOOOOOOOPID customer management portal has far too many stupid, stupid, rubbish rules and hoops that makes it really difficult for me to actually give them money.

You can ONLY pay with one card. Fair enough. But I’ve got two accounts. So I can pay for one account with no issue. Try using that card for the second account and BOOOOM there’s a problem. SECURITY issues. Might be fraudulent.

What absolute monkey thought that one up?

Next issue: I thought I’d use a different, different card — a credit card — to pay for my 6.91 pounds outstanding bill.

Mistake.

Their stupid system prompted me with IDIOT errors every time I tried to pay.

On the third time of trying, here’s what I got:

The card registered
The number of payment attempts has reached the maximum allowed. Please hold while I transfer you to someone in our team

Some MUPPET has actually just cut and paste that from the telephone billing system. That’s…. almost helpful. You can do all the branding and marketing you like, but at the end of the day, silly thinks like this demonstrate that at T-Mobile UK headquarters, the lights are most definitely on, but no one is home.

“Please hold?” I’m on the WEB, you MONKEY.